Jigga-what?

I knew babies were evil!

In other news- the snow looks pretty outside today. I think I’m going to have to go get some coffee. I just tried to type “the snow looks pretty outside today” and literally re-did every word 3 times…fail.

New things I’m obsessed with:

-Juicy Fruit! Ok- this isn’t new- but the fact that they switched to paper wrappers is! Inside it says “60 Million soda cans equals 850 metric tons. That’s how much aluminum Wigley will keep out of landfills each year by switching to paper wrappers” How nice!  So not only is it delicious but now I’m chewing socially conscious!

-Pita Bread- it’s so delicious- I eat it with sandwiches, butter, dipped in oil- just great.

-De-Cluttering. You always hear that when your stuff is cluttery your life is cluttery and I’ve become obsessed with making sure my stuff is organized so that juuust incase my life gets cluttery I still have a sanctuary at home. Also tackling things on to-do lists- I’ve become super productive and go-getty…(is that a phrase?)

-Sunlight- The winter months are so gloomy that usually you get all vitamin D deficiant and get the winter depression. So the trick is to get some light the best you can and so every time the sun is out I open all the curtains and I don’t wear sunglasses or put my visor down in my car so I can soak it up. Also- Jennifer told me about these light bulbs that simulate sunshine which I plan to go and get too. They are sometimes called “Full spectrum light bulbs” but sounds like a nice plan to me!

-Michael Buble- there’s just so much about him that I like- saw him on SNL- hilarious skit with Jon Hamm from Mad Men.

Hamm & Buble

Posted to New York Magazine on February 01, 2010

Click to Play | View Details

Plus I really like that new song of his. WIN! AAAnd he’s so freaking cute! Too bad he just got engaged or he’d be in trouble.

Calling all Zen

For the record- if you lose your gloves during the second week of February you are SCUH-REWED. There are no gloves in the city- after going around and searching- where did I find some? Kroger…my lovely, never let me down Kroger. I even got them on sale with my Kroger Plus Card- score! (Target- fail city FYI) So yes- don’t do that. It’s not a good idea.

The pending changes in life seem to be sending me into a grinding stress mode that is not quite what I had envisioned for my last week of sleeping in life. SO….trying to figure out a way to remedy that so that I don’t go into my new position a complete wreck- so far so fail. So how about some nice, calming photos and ideas to get me in the right mind-set as well as get ALL of us into the right mode since the weather has been grody and spring is taking its sweet-ass time.

St. Theresa’s Prayer

May today there be peace within.

May you trust that you are exactly
where you are meant to be.

May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are
born of faith in yourself and others.

May you use the gifts that you have received,
and pass on the love that has been given to you.

May you be content with yourself
just the way you are.

Let this knowledge settle into your bones,
and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love.

It is there for each and every one of us.

Let’s hope I can keep this feeling up! I need to tape those pictures on the inside of my eyelids. LOL Wish me luck!!

Is there room for me in Marmaduke?

Have I mentioned my life is a cartoon? Cause….it is.

The pending life change I’m facing is making me want to get ALL of my affairs in order so that by the time next Monday comes around I don’t have all this “Oh I really need to get that done” stuff looming over my head. SO this weekend I mega cleaned my room and got rid of all the clutter. Dusted my car. I finally synched my iPod with my iTunes (which in turn made me lose EVERYTHING including some of the music I recently purchased through iTunes..figure that one out).

I bought picture frames for the Sh*t Bear art I bought this past summer that’s been just sitting there and for the Dino photo Sara got me for my birthday that I broke the frame on.  Sat on hold for 45 minutes with Sirius trying to get my radio turned back on (no luck) but at least sent an email to them to get the ball rolling.  So now I just had an oil change and to FINALLY finalize my car loan stuff with the bank. Well I woke up this morning 45 minutes early to go and get my oil changed and I might as well have just stayed in bed. I went to the Jiffy Lube by my house which I hadn’t been to yet. (If you recall the LAST time I got my oil changed at the WalMart oil change center by my old place they left the cap off and oil exploded all over my brand new car’s engine- so never going THERE again)

I actually usually have great luck with Jiffy Lube but today I waited almost an HOUR for a freaking oil change. There was 1 car in front of me so the 20 minute initial wait was fine but these guys took their sweet freaking time and then to top it off as I’m scrambling to get out of there they’re holding up my payment because the guy cashing me out is HITTING on me. He’s all “ohh- yeah- I love reading (I had a book in my hand) and I read books all the time but it takes away from my homework for college where I am studying to become a computer techinitian…bet you never knew that guys from Jiffy Lube could go to college- yeah- this job’s alright but I’m going places ya know?” BLAH BLAH BLAH! I’m going “GIVE ME MY FREAKING RECIEPT OR I AM GOING TO RUN YOU OVER WITH MY NEWLY LUBED CAR!!!”

So of course I end up booking it into work feeling all rushed and annoyed. PLUS I totally lost my winter gloves somewhere between Friday and now.  Who loses their gloves with like…3 more weeks of winter left? So now I have to go and get NEW gloves because of the pending Snowmageddon 2 (wonder if Bruce Willis will star in that?).

Good things coming this week:

1. Sleeping in for the last time

2. Possible rock climbing with T

3. Meeting my new Little

So let’s hope all goes well there.  Also had a great time getting coffee with the wonderful Jennifer Atteberry- very great to catch up with her. (I also drank WAYYY too much coffee- Jennifer- you really need to watch me- lol I had the shakes the rest of the day)

Superbowl Party at Daniel’s was really fun- sorry for the loss but glad that football is over for a while- I’ve been ready for a pig skin break for a while now.   And bravo to Daniel for throwing a stellar UIndy reunion party lol!

OK- off to keep myself entertained- of course the ONE day I don’t bring my book is the day I have time to read it. Freaking Polygamy book gets me EVERY time!

You could live in Haiti

Please don’t take offense at the title of this blog because I truly mean it. My past few days of my life have been comically terrible and I have to try and be the Conan O’Brien of my life and keep everything in perspective-

SO I wanted to put that title up before I started writing what’s been going on.

I’ve been gone for a few days- that whole Chicago trip was fun but took a lot of wind out of my sails so I was a tired lady. I was so ready to get back to work and for things to FINALLY get back to normal for a while. And God knows that the second you say that- then he is going to take that lovely idea you had of “normal” and smash it with a hammer.

I get into work yesterday and had a meeting with my boss- long story short- I will be moving to mornings for traffic. This story will be short because the details are not as important as it is that I communicate how sad I will be to leave Steve’s show and my friends from the afternoon. The wonderful side being that the folks in the morning are equally wonderful so I won’t be missing out on wonderful people. I will however be missing out on my sleep and the lovely schedule I was more that grateful to have.  I just keep thinking about the 47 times this weekend I told everyone how much I loved the job I had and couldn’t ask for a more perfect situation in which to be working….and things all changed. I want to also say that even though my tone is a sad one on this- that I didn’t get into trouble- so don’t think there is some scandal there…just not an ideal choice for my career path- that’s all.

Then things get comical. This week…

-My favorite band broke up.

RIP Fall Out Boy

-My stupid new coat that I have to continually sew the buttons back onto- one of the buttons on the sleeve BROKE- like busted…

These damn buttons are ruining EVERYTHING!

(Side note- I just realized I was talking to my mom on the phone this morning and said “shit”…sorry mom lol)

-Bad day yesterday so this morning I wanted to cheer myself up with some wonderful Sirius Radio (I know, I know- I’m a traitor- but it came free with my car and I got sucked in! I like to think of it as market research- Indiana is behind on its new music so I’m just doing a solid to my listeners by knowing stuff ahead of time…?) and my free subscription ended TODAY.

-I decided to listen to some terrestrial radio only to find out someone had changed all of my pre-sets in my car and I couldn’t find any of the stations I had programmed on there. And the snow was enough this morning on my drive in that I couldn’t fix it.

-I JUST paid yesterday morning for an entire month of parking only to realize that there is no way I can safely walk a mile at 4:30 in the morning with my new schedule…so…so much for that plan…and money…

-Snowmageddon outside is going on riiiight now- which means a rough rush hour for this lil’ traffic reporter.

SO again…I want to reiterate the title of this blog and keep it all in perspective. I’m a very lucky lady and the things I get to complain about I am lucky to be able to complain about them. It could be 40 bazillion times worse and I need to be grateful for what I have- which is a lot. So yes- more happy blogs to come- I swear! In the mean time I’m going to go listen to Disloyal Order of the Water Buffalos in the fetal position in a corner.

Filmed in front of a live studio audience

Relaxing in Chicago at Belac’s apartment. We went to Ryan’s audition early this morning and since I woke up this morning my life has been a sitcom!

-Ryan and I walk to the train station

-The ATM is nowhere near the machine to load your card with money

-Man at the ticket booth has no money to make change

-We finally get through and totally miss the first train

-Waiting for the next one a man comes walking up the stairs screaming at the top of his lungs about an “F’n B” (if you catch my drift). He’s screaming and screaming and telling people to “GET OUT OF MY WAY” etc. No one knew who he was talking TO but he just keeeept screaming. So then the lady next to us was like “it is TOO early for this…(and then yells to the man) if it’s that bad the third rail is riiiight there. If it’s that bad JUMP!” she was our friend instantly. So then the train security calls the police cause the man will NOT stop screaming. The police come around at the same time our train does so I miss whatever amazing cops episode might have resulted.

-The train announcer announces our stop will be next and then proceeds to completely pass it. The other people on the train were going “uhh- they just passed our stop!” and so we had to get off at the next one. At this point our ridiculous adventure had taken almost an hour- instead of about 30 minutes and by the time we get off the train it is 4 minutes until Ryan’s audition and we have several blocks to cover so we just run.

Running down the streets of Chicago, bolt into the hotel where the auditions are being held, dash into the elevator where Ryan starts to strip off her walking shoes and sweatpants she wore under her dress, I’m snatching them and grabbing her coat so she can get ready. The other people in the elevator think we’re insane…or…that they finally know what Superman did in the phone booth-

either/ or…But she made it there and the lady running it was super nice and gave her time to catch her breath before she auditioned.

-We head back and catch the train- which miraculously stops where it’s supposed to this time. Then head back to Caleb’s only to encounter ANOTHER screamer on the way back.

Some lady screaming in the street how if she had been able to keep her job she would have been able to save her family and how she owed “them” NOTHING. I’m starting to think or train screamer and our street screamer are married and just haven’t found a healthy way to vent their frustration yet. I’ve heard foam bats work wonders.

-Now we’ve been chilling at Caleb’s all day- catching up on all the things I haven’t been able to make fun of him for in years- (dyslexia, gay, overly ticklish knees, you know- the good stuff).

(this- by the way is a picture I drew of Caleb in college that he had on his facebook page- I am the best artist in the world)

We had a great time with Jimmy & Jo in Michigan City too- they are doing wonderful in their beautiful doll-house castle. We ate out, did some time at Vegas Baby in the Blue Chip Casino with the Journey Cover Band- (what are the odds?) and had a great time catching up there too.

Also- I’ve suddenly gotten a case of the sitcom stumbles- since I’ve been at Caleb’s I’ve…

-Thrown an entire bowl of cereal on his kitchen floor

-Almost launched a hot dog to his death on the floor

-Almost face planted at the grocery store on a smashed grape (I love making wine…it’s fermenting as we speak)

So…if it involves food and the floor I better just stay away- I’m hanging out in carpeted areas until further notice.

(Mom…you have some ’splaining to do…)

While writing this eating crackers & cheese- lots of Ritz down my shirt…

In the gene-pool of life I think I got pretty lucky- I look pretty much like my Mom which I think is a great thing.  Plus everyone always says how young my Mom looks- consider myself planning to be “coug-ing” it up in my older years.  I am pretty average in most areas- average height, average shoe size, average jean size- all things I’m pretty ok with.

I also did get a few things from my Dad- I got his sense of humor for sure, I think his muscle mass because I’m one strong mofo, and then…there’s the one part of him I sort of have always wished I could give back…

How did I end up with my Dad’s fore-arms??? Serious- it’s bad.  They are hairier than those cave-man guys from the Geico commercials.

I used to never really notice it too much because i’ts blonde but lately it’s been getting out of control.  And it literally just stops at the elbow- I’ve got my mom’s upper arms- my Dad’s forearms.  The arm hair was like seriously all creeping through my shirt sleeves and crazy stuff like that. I was grossing MYSELF out! So I decided to take drastic measures…

Options:

1. Arm transplant ala Heidi Montag- but the cost and my overall resistance to transplanting skin when it’s not necessary sort of put that one on hold

2. Shave it off- Allie kept pushing for this one but I couldn’t do that- I know my body well enough if I shave it off it’ll grown back 4ft long and green

3. Veet it!

for those of you who don’t know is along the lines of Nair- I’ve never used Nair because it terrifies me but Veet actually has worked for me. It’s meant mostly for legs but I get restless waiting for my leg hair to grow to the length needed for it to work. (OK…well in the winter it’s not that hard…lol) But I decided this was my best option since it didn’t hurt at all and I knew the results were good.

So the other day I sprayed the Veet all over my forearms and waited the appropriate length of time. The hair came off easily and that was that…..well..sort of….

My arms look like ALIEN arms!

I’ve always had ridiculously hairy forearms and now they are as naked as the start of Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

And it is just so foreign to me. I was at the gym last night and every time I glanced down at my arms my brain went “GASP!…oh…wait..those are MY arms” lol. I don’t think it looks freakish in real life but to ME this is whole new look for my Dad-arms.

Hmm..maybe the next time I go home I’ll try it on Dad?

Orrr….maybe not….

Anyway…I’ll let you know what happens when it grows out again- but in the mean time- feel free to come and pet my freakish arms for $5. LOL

PLEASE NOTE

THIS GUY IS NOT CUTE! QUIT TRYING TO TELL ME THAT HE IS GIRLY MAGAZINES!! Furthermore! Quit putting him in commercials- he’s nasty! His weird fug face and the voice is NOT EVEN HIS- he literally is just an ugly Canadian who mouths words to songs in pirate costumes.  I can’t respect this at all.

AND EVEN FURTHER more! Freecreditreport.com rips you off! It isn’t even free! They charge your credit card tons of money every month and hope it’ll take you a long time to notice.

OK…I’ve been wanting to get that off my chest for a long time.

So..since we’re keeping record- the following commercial mascots can F-off:

-Charmin Bears

-Free Credit Report.com guy

-aaaaand anyone in The General auto insurance commercials. ANYONE!

Day of Lists!!

Reasons My Sister is Ruining My Life through food: (this is all I think about now)

-Nerds

-Fruit tarts

-Chocolate, Banana, peanut-butter milk shakes

-Pizza

-Kate and John’ special Pasta

Things I fail at in Life:

-Painting my nails and NOT chipping them the very next day

-not getting food stuck in my teeth. (I hate you dentist for ruining the space between my molars!!)

Things that are exciting!:

-My previous Big Brother’s Big Sister’s match had to be closed due to my little’s lack of interest in the program BUT I may be getting my NEW little soon! I got a call about a potential new little today so hopefully things work out!

-I went and picked up my new contacts today.

-Sunshine!

OK- I feel scatter-brained enough today that writing more is hard lol. SO! Have a great day!

Back at the wheel

I sort of don’t care for donuts but for some reason all I want in this world is a powdered donut.  That’s what I get for watching DVR’d Cake Boss while I get ready for work.

Hi Everybody!

I’m back! (For now) Had an amazing time in NYC- Kate and John were awesome hosts and took my everywhere. I think my desire to move there eventually is getting stronger and stronger. It really helps when you have family there because then you’re not going “to make your dreams come true!” (*cough-Madonna-*cough).

And don’t get me wrong- I love Indy- but arriving at the Indianapolis International Airport to a scrawny white dude in work boots, tight jeans, cut off sleeved t-shirt that was too big for him and STILL tucked in, and his mullet…

really made me want to turn, run back through security, and run to the plane screaming “Don’t Leave me here!!!!” LOL Ohhh Indiana…just when I think you and I are on the same page…you let me down.

But alas I won’t be here long, already getting geared up to go with Ryno to Chicago for her big auditions. Get to see the Am-AH-zing Jo and Jimmothy and then on to stay with Belac for a few days.  Can’t wait- haven’t seen my pals in forever! Plus a road trip with Ryno will be fun. (Argh- if only Sara hadn’t gone 2 weeks ago we’d be a complete road trip of college c-raziness!)

Finished Russel Brand’s book- pretty good- probably would have enjoyed it much more if I had understood half of the British slang and inside jokes and pop culture. (If it were written by an American I would have been ALL OVER it!)

Uhmm- things I’m happy about at this moment:

-Sunshine outside!

-I actually unpacked AND did all my laundry last night when I got home- a new RECORD!

-My new contacts are in- cause if I actually told you how long these current ones have been in my eyes without a break you would phone my eye doctor and drag me there kicking and screaming to tell him what I’ve done. And then he would pop my eyes out because if I’m not going to take good care of them I don’t deserve them. HEY! I floss- leave me alone!

-Catching up on all the DVR’d shows I missed on vacation- last night watched the last week of Conan, Teen Mom, Tough Love. Still have Chuck, Biggest Loser, Real Housewives of Orange County, True Life, Jersey Shore…having anxiety attack just thinking about it! LOL

OK- back to the ol’ grindstone…and by that I mean…my super awesome job.

LaGuardia is not LaGreatia

You’d expect that since this airport is so big and so many people fly into it that it’d be somewhat up to par along with other airports…not so much.

-Security was a mess and it took forever to get more plastic bins that ran out in the line that I was in. And the other security people just kept going “where IS everyone??” Not a good sign.

-They don’t have TV signs to tell you when your flight takes off and what the next flight is. They have slide-in billboards with pre-made destinations and times.

-The people here are EXTRA annoying for some reason. It could also be that I’m sitting technically in the Spirit airlines gate with everyone waiting for a flight to Ft. Lauderdale Florida…and…anyone who goes there is annoying…so…that imght be why.

-Finding an outlet for your computer is similar to finding a great pair of shoes in size 81/2 at a Macy’s sale- you better be ready to punch someone in the face to get a spot. (Happy to report I in fact did my punching and am sitting next to the outlet as we speak)